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John Marston Quotes This is a quotes page. Quotes must be typed as they occur in-game, and may have spelling and grammar errors. Before correcting apparent errors, verify how they appear in-game.


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Single Player Quotes

A Frenchman, a Welshman and an Irishman

  • You've got it all wrong, Welsh. All wrong. It was French I promise. He said he was going to rip you off, now he's ripping me off.
  • I never stole nothing, sir. Never did. Not in all me life. That French cunt. He's playing with the Welshman's tiny and innefective mind.
  • I always did have the last laugh, Welsh, me boy.
  • Don't worry, old pal. Hell's better than Wales.
  • I can't thank you enough for takin' care of those two degenerates. Untrustworthy, poor in personal hygiene, lacking in the finer qualities of a gentleman.
  • It'd be my pleasure. She's magnificent. Goverment issue. It'll be a bit of a ride but we'll get there soon enough. Follow me fella.
  • Let's get this over with. The saloon's callin' me.
  • Alrighty me gardian angel. This way.
  • Come on, let's find this gun.
  • This is turnin' into a hell of a day!

Conversation 1

  • What's your name, friend?
  • Stroke of luck you came around, fella. I'd thought I'd drunk me last breakfast there for a second.
  • They was me only friends in the world. And boy am I glad to see them bastards dead.
  • We all met on the boat over a few years back, we did. Thick as thieves ever since, and that right there was the problem.
  • Never trust a Welshman, me Pa always told me, and he got his throat slit, so he should know. The kind of fellas who'll steal an acorn from a blind sow and then kick her for squealin'. And as for that French bastard...

Conversation 2

  • Life's too short for regrets... and I'd outgrown them fools. They both was getting incredibly unreliable. I was that brains of the operation, as you can imagine.
  • They caught me off gaurd on that one occasion. On account of a little tipple I allowed meself earlier in the day.
  • That's what we're about to find out.

Conversation 3

  • So how do you know that swindlin' charlatan, West Dickens?
  • I tried some of that tonic of his one time gave me back-door trots for weeks.
  • Blows in on his wind, West Dickens does. That fella yarns longer than a strumpet's dream.
  • I'm with you there. There's nothin' worse than a nobody thinking he's a somebody.
  • The fella who'll put a window in your skull without a second's hesitation.
  • Be careful, pal. What's stoppin' me from killing you?

Conversation 4

  • Are you a whorin' man?
  • Don't you play dumb now; I knows one when I sees him. It's in a man's eyes.
  • I bet you've had a few doses of the old brothel sprouts in your time.
  • Come off it. Who are you tryin' to kid? What, do you like the fellas or somethin'?
  • Ad what's your point, Mr. Jesus of Nazareth? Listen, after all we've been through back there, I got a hankerin' for a good poke and a drop of the old conversation fluid.
  • What do you say, cowboy, why don't we hightail it back to Armadillo and treat ourselves to a proper slice of the good life?

Conversation 5

  • Give me some time to get me breath back. We can talk when we're a bit nearer.

Conversation 6

  • I'm gonna have to rest the old lungs for a bit, pal. Gettin' drowned takes it out of a fella.

Conversation 7

  • I must've swallowed half a barrel of water back there. I can't even talk now. Give us a moment of peace.

Conversation 8

  • Better watch your mouth, me friend. I've cut out a man's tongue for less.
  • It was just a joke, fella.
  • Not far now. The thievin' bastards are holed up at the cabin by the lake. Can't wait to see the look on their faces when we blast in there. They'll be more suprised than a slut dog with her fisrt porcupine.
  • Listen, fella. I didn't ask for your help back there. I don't owe you nothin'.
  • I've had enough of your overly aggressive manner, fella. You don't know who you're dealin' with here.
  • You can make quick work of them fellas if they give you trouble. The gun's stored just inside that shack.
  • Aaah... I'll cover you from the ridge... I'm better from long range. It'll be a piece of cake, fella. Trust me.

Man is Born Unto Trouble

  • That's a mighty fine corset you got there, young lady. Let Uncle Irish untie them strings.
  • Where are ya? Who do ya want? I see ya! Get away from me!
  • Aah, Mr. Marston. I found you one.
  • Not really, happens to me all the time.
  • No, friend, I wants to buy you a drink. I wants to tell you how much you means to me. How special you is.
  • It's the whiskey, sir... It gives me the memory of a new born babe. As innocent as can be.  
  • Yes, let's do that.

Multiplayer Quotes

  • "You know who I am?"
  • "Nobody shoots at Irish and lives!"
  • "I'd give up now if I was you!"
  • "Jesus! If you had a brain you'd be dangerous!"
  • "When I'm done, there won't be enough of ya left to snore!"
  • "Me ma could shoot better than you!"
  • "You're done for now, ya bumb bastard!"
  • "Don't be putting on those big looks with me, pal!"
  • "Who wants a hole in their head?"
  • "Ain't you got some peckers to be suckin'?"
  • "Come on, fellas, this is too easy!"
  • "I'm warning you, back the hell down!"
  • "You're about to be buzzard food!"
  • "I'm right here, you dumb bastards!"
  • "That's a whole lot of swagger fer a little fella"
  • "Get the hell away from me!"
  • "Look at this sorry bunch of arseholes"
  • "Don't ya know who I am?"
  • "I'll show ya how to kill a man!"
  • "Think you're a real hard-case, don't you?"
  • "You couldn't shoot a shite out of your own arse!"
  • "A hundred of you couldn't kill me!"
  • "You're not all there are ya?"
  • "I ain't afraid of nobody, least of all you!"
  • "I'll make you moan like a whore!"
  • "Pig fucking son of a whore!"
  • "You sure don't look like no big-time outlaw!"
  • "Stinkin' sons of strumpets!"
  • "Go to hell, you dumb twaddlin' bastards!"

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